Your Fabulous Fall Wardrobe, as Told by a Dyke Princess

Latex, lace, and leather, DUH.

Hello, my darling dykes. Whether you’re mourning over the end of the summer, or excitedly counting the days until hayrides and Halloween, you’re going to need a fall wardrobe. And not just ANY fall wardrobe. One with style, one with sexiness, and one with strength. A dyke princess wardrobe, is what I’m trying to say. A dyke princess doesn’t follow the fashion forecast; rather, she wears whatever slutty, lacy, boundary-pushing attire her heart desires. And because a dyke princess only dresses for herself, and no one else (okay, fine, and also for hot daddy dykes), she always looks fly. Because what gives you more confidence than wearing whatever you damn well please?

photo by Pascal B.

If you’re looking to rev up your style for fall, allow me to bestow upon you, my lovely lez, some favorite pieces of mine that I’ve curated for my dyke princess fall wardrobe. I can personally attest to every item on here’s quality and chic factor. So while you’re getting your last wears out of your cut-out bikinis and flowy maxi dresses, it’s time to shop for fall, babes.

1. Lit in Latex

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Latex is always in style in my dyke princess handbook. But wearing latex in the summer can be flat-out hellacious, darling, so thankfully cooler weather is ahead. Fall is the perfect time to rock latex. You don’t have to sweat profusely, but you don’t have to cover up all that sex appeal with a winter jacket.

Lovehoney Rubber Girl Latex Plunge Mini Dress: $48.99.

2. Don’t Stop the Lingerie Party

Lingerie as clothing for summer was all the rage, but who says you have to stop being slutty in the fall? Not I. Try your fave lace bra or teddy under a light sweater or bomber jacket. I just got this incredible Parisienne set from Lovehoney and the quality is divine. Since I have no patience (or shame), I’ll be skipping the sweater and bomber jacket and rocking this as a top this weekend.

Lovehoney Parisienne Black Plunge Longline Bra and Crotchless Thong Set: $49.99.

3. Femme-icure

The femme-icure is ALWAYS in style. My most recent femme-icures from the fabulous queer-friendly salon Wild Oleander have been less colorful than my first Pride set, and I’m LOVING shiny black nails for fall.

Wild Oleander Gel Extension with Gel Polish Full Set: $95+.

4. As IF!

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Racked recently published a hilarious article on why these colored plaid sets are showing up EVERYWHERE. Well, call me a sucker for marketing (and for always wanting to be Cher Horowitz), because I want every one I see, like this sexy get up by Current Mood for Dolls Kill.

Runnin Late Plaid Bra: $22.

5. Patent Leather Booties

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Sensible footwear is for ugly people; dyke princesses know this. But we also know that our feet F*CKING HURT. So what’s the solution? A nice chunky rubber heel. Plus, the patent leather is, like, totally weather-resistant. These are basically snow boots. So they count for your winter wardrobe, too.

Lug Sole High Heeled Boots: $69.90.

6. Big AF Sunglasses

Big, obnoxious sunglasses are the most important component to your dyke princess wardrobe. They say, I may be wildly hungover on a Tuesday and haven’t gotten my lash extensions filled in 4 weeks, but f*ck you, I’m fabulous. None of that small, hipster sunglass trend nonsense. Dyke princesses wear sunglasses big, big, big — we’re total size queens.

Feisedy Oversized Cat Eye Sunglasses: $10.49.

7. Bodysuit Babe

I wholeheartedly believe that Thistle and Spire makes some of the sexiest lingerie I have ever seen. And I own a lot! I love black but I can’t help but fall in love with this emerald color. Try this unique body suit under a leather jacket and you are a fall goddess.

Constellation Bodysuit in Emerald: $88.

8. Serpent-Inspired Lipstick

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We all love snakeskin bags and shoes, but what about serpent lips? Dark and sexy meets sick and twisted — just like you, babe.

Melt Cosmetics Lipstick in Blow: $19.

What is your favorite fall lewk? Tell us in the comments!

And if you need a shopping buddy, lez me know.

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