A Simple, Swaggy Style Guide For The Lesbian New To The City

Leather. Pleather. Vinyl. That is the mantra.

Photo by istock

Hello, new NYC lesbian, and welcome to this beautiful gay sprawling metropolis of queerdom.

Prepare yourself to see hot lesbians running free. Feel the queer girl energy in your bodega, the Laundromat, a random elevator, the bar bathroom– nowhere is safe so you need to look on point at all times. I know, I know, all these girls are super-swaggy and it can be extremely intimidating.

‘Especially if you’re in Brooklyn. There are some weird-ass style things happening, and it can be hard to know where to start. When does one start excessively wearing 80s windbreakers and mom jeans? What does one wear when you don’t feel like you are hot enough to ironically pull off a dad Hawaiian button up? That’s where I come in, honey. I like pasta way too much to do the whole ugly-chic thing and I prefer a department store to L Train Vintage.

If you want to start out basic, and work your way up the total pole of edgy lesbian style, allow me to be your spirit guide. If you want to skip this article, I’ll give you a hint: just wear all black. If you want more, read on for a comprehensive lezzie city style list.

You only need a few staple pieces, and my gay ass is here to help.

1. Leather Leggings

These spanx leather leggings are my LIFE. I’m pretty sure they’ve gotten me laid multiple times. I know $100 for leggings is a lot, but can you really put a price on how perfect your ass is going to look in these?

2. Vinyl Pants

Photo by @wearall

I think these speak for themselves. Fiiirrreee.

3. Cropped Leather Jacket

Photo by polyvore.com

Like the most quintessential lesbian uniform — only sluttier.

4. Witty T Shirt

I’ve gone on dates wearing my “I”m out of my mind, leave a message shirt” and no one thinks I’m insane, cause this is New York and we all are.

5. Booties

Photo by @aerosoles_shoes

Don’t be like me and let your heel addiction make you Uber everywhere. Invest in some sensible, chic black booties.

6. O Ring Collar

God is watching so give her a good show.

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Let those hot lesbians know you a freak, babe.

7. LBD

Photo by @fashionnova

8. Over The Top Coat

NY winters suck, but that doesn’t mean your style has to. Ditch that ugly puffer coat for a wildly-less-practical but way chicer faux fur jacket.

9. Unique Lip

Photo by @fluidebeauty

I can do all things through which liquid lipstick strengthens me.

10. Whatever you want! This is the city of dreams, darling. Express yourself. 

You can be whoever you want here, babe. That’s the point.