Hello glorious, beautiful, perfect lesbians. Today is our day! Today we celebrate being visible AF lesbians. I am celebrating by ordering $50 worth of Juice Press for my v bloated face, listening to “The L Word” theme song on repeat, texting emotional paragraphs to all my exes, having a Gia marathon, wearing a leather jacket, and making this list all of my most favorite parts of being a lesbian. There is so much to love and celebrate that it was hard to narrow it down, but here goes, babes.
1. “The L Word” is the gift that keeps on giving.
I am not good at many things in life, but I will kick your ass at “The L Word” trivia any day. I have a freakishly encyclopedic memory when it comes to our favorite lezzie drama, and I am so grateful for being a closeted 13-year old and binge watching it because it’s gifted me with some of the best entertainment (and masturbation material—helllooo Shane and Cherie poolside) of my life! Not to mention the amazing soundtrack. I’m listening to Dream by Bardi Johansson and Noemi as I write this, which, I might add, was playing as Alice left a romantic watch for Tasha (that totally triggered her PTSD—whoops!). Like I said: ENCYCLOPEDIC MEMORY.
2. Scissoring. It’s real. That is all.
I don’t have time for any of you narrow minded nasties that say scissoring is a fake porn fantasy of the patriarchy. YAWN. I mean, have you TRIED IT? If not, you are missing out on what, in my humble (best) opinion, is the most fun part of being a lesbian. Sure, it takes a ton of coordination, can be awkward at first, and takes some skill and flexibility, but so do all the greatest things in life.
Being a lesbian is incredible because it instantly connects you, spiritually and inextricably, to a family. Every single one of us under the LGBTQ umbrella has got each other’s fabulous backs (even if we argue semantics on the internet of the WORST parts of being a lesbian BUT I DIGRESS). Today, we are only CELEBRATING, honey.
4. The ART.
Is it me, or do lesbians make the best art? Name a better break-up album than Tegan and Sara’s “The Con.” Name a hotter movie than “Below Her Mouth.” Name a better book than “Stone Butch Blues.” Name a better actress than Lena Waithe.
5. I’m proud AF.
Being a lesbian has granted me so much confidence. If you’re different, you stand out. If you stand out, you need a thick skin. You need style. You need swag. In turn, these inevitably give you the confidence of a sapphic goddess!
6. Getting to kiss hot girls, duh.
This one is self-explanatory, but I’ll go on and on anyway because it’s what I do for a living. I’ve been making out with girls for, like, 15 years, but I still get giddy and excited every time. Like, can anything in life be any more lit than being a hot girl kissing a hot girl?
7. The fashion.
8. The bars.
What keeps me going through a particularly bleak week is the promise of an epic happy hour at beloved lez spot Cubbyhole. If you’re feeling down, I can guarantee that 15 minutes in Cubby will change that. Before you know it, you’ll be tossing back a shot with the friendly and fun AF bartenders, stuffing your face with free pizza, and chatting up the sexy ass girl sitting next to you.
9. Working for GO Mag.
If I wasn’t a flaming homosexual, I wouldn’t have the immense honor of working here and bringing you all the lezzie content! I feel like the luckiest lesbian in the world.
10. Leather pants.
I’m thankful for dykes in leather pants. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
11. WORLD PRIDE IS THIS YEAR.
Pride is stressful AF when you work for a lesbian magazine. The planning! The content! The organization! The float! The parties! The tabling! But, it’s also the most magical thing on earth. Pride started as a riot, and, now, it’s a party honoring all the work and sacrifices our brothers and sisters have made for us to be practically naked on the street covered in glitter. Icons only.
Speaking of Pride, how lucky are we to have the opportunity to visit a LIVING, BREATHING part of queer history like The Stonewall Inn? Literally where Pride began! And this year, in addition to WORLD PRIDE, it’s the 50th anniversary of The Stonewall uprising. We have such a rich history filled with resistance, love, and strength.
13. Melissa Etheridge.
True story: I had an orgasm from just watching Melissa Etheridge on stage last year.
While many queer people around the world aren’t as fortunate, I love being free to be me: a huge dyke.
Happy Lesbian Day Of Visibility! What is your favorite part about being a lesbian? How are you celebrating today? Do you want to go out with me? Let us know in the comments!