Dear Corinne,
I’m confused about my orgasms. Everyone seems so snobby about the g-spot orgasm being superior, but I love clitoral orgasms. Even when I do orgasm from something else, be it penetration, nipple play, or mental, I still feel the orgasm in my clit. Is there something wrong with me?
Love,
Lit
Dearest Lit,
First and foremost, I want you to know that you are not alone in your orgasm woes. In a 2017 study, The Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy found that nearly 37 percent of American women required clitoral stimulation to orgasm — and only 18 percent of women say vaginal penetration of any kind is enough to come. These numbers simply prove that our bodies are complex.
But even more important than statistics or numbers is the fact that there is no such thing as a superior orgasm. All orgasms are amazing orgasms — they give you pleasure, release, oxytocin and a boost of sexual confidence. You said you love clitoral orgasms and that’s what you’re experiencing, so it seems that you know your desires and you’re fulfilling them, which is exactly what I help people obtain in my sex education practice. There is absolutely nothing wrong with you if the way your body reaches climax is through your clitoris. In fact, that’s the norm for most people with vulvas.
However, if you want to experience other types of orgasms — there are so many to explore! There are a total of 10 different kinds of orgasms that people with vulvas can feel. Every body is different and has its own complex makeup of chemistry and nervous system responses, so the way you feel these orgasms may differ. It could be that while you’re feeling g-spot stimulation and it’s amazing, your clitoral orgasm just overpowers all the other pleasure your body is experiencing in the moment.
People with vulvas can have vaginal, g-spot, mental, nipple, anal, childbirth or even kissing orgasms (just to list a few). There are so many different avenues to explore in your orgasmic world. If your goal is to feel these new and different sensations of pleasure, then my best advice is to isolate stimulation to that particular area and focus on the sensations your body is feeling and where it’s reacting.
Different kind of stimulation may still result in a clitoral orgasm for you, even if your clit isn’t being touched. It comes down to how your nervous system is wired and how your brain communicates with your sexual responses. Just remember that your body is a good place to be. And your pleasure is your own to experience however is best for you!
Corinne Kai is the Managing Editor and resident sex educator at GO Magazine. You can listen to her rambles through her podcast Femme, Collectively. The advice offered in this column is intended for informational purposes only and should not replace or substitute for any medical, or other professional advice or help.
