My Pride Party Brings All The Gays To The Yard

Here is a secret I learned from many many summers without a pool because I wasn’t a cool rich kid: Slip N Slide.

Happy Pride Month! Since queer people are not annoying weirdos, we are not the type to be protesting Coronavirus and refusing to wear masks.

But that doesn’t mean we aren’t bummed that our Pride marches got canceled! If you’re like me, your favorite part of Pride is seeing people celebrate who they really are. I feel particularly sad for the newly out queer people, or people who were building up the courage to go to their first Pride. 

I remember my first Pride, I was dating a really dramatic girl who insisted on shouting at me the whole time. She fought me about the train, about walking, about glitter, you name it, and she blamed me. (Editor note: F*ck you Nik. I was in high school!) But I wouldn’t trade that memory for anything! I was surrounded by people just like me for the first time. 

Once you’ve attended Pride a few times, you kind of get the point. If you are one of the people who is missing out on Pride, don’t despair! I’m here to share some good queer fun you can have in your own backyard (if you don’t have a yard, this can be moved indoors.) If you’re a seasoned queer, think of hosting something so that the young queers in your life can enjoy just showing up and enjoying themselves. It’s always fun to share a good time with friends and reflect on the strides and struggles of our community. 

Depending on where you live, Pride month doesn’t have to go by unnoticed. Here are a few tips on how to enjoy Pride without getting Coronavirus.

Pants + Pumps BBQ

We are allowed to gather in groups of 10, so invite people over and have a barbecue! I love a good barbecue where butches stand around the grill and femmes make fun of us. Get some veggie burgers and soak your carrots in smoked paprika for carrotdogs because at least one of your guests is going to be vegan. It is not a maybe, it’s Pride. Also don’t forget to fill the cooler with gluten-free beer and humanely sourced moonshine! My personal favorite barbecue recipe is called “put a hot dog on a stick and put it over an open flame until it is crispy”.

Show Off All The Tik Tok Dances You Learned In Quarantine 

Here’s a great Pride Playlist from GO Mag. Make Alexa get in on the Pride! I am fully convinced that Alexa is a lesbian, she literally moves in with you the first day you meet! 

Get Wet

Here is a secret I learned from many many summers without a pool because I wasn’t a cool rich kid. Slip n slide. You don’t have to be a kid to enjoy flinging yourself around your yard. (Don’t forget to move any rocks hiding in the grass, this lesson I learned the hard way.) Go the DIY route and use a tarp instead of the prepackaged brand name slide. EXTRA tip: put some dish soap on there to make it extra slippy! Spray your crush with the hose! Tire yourselves out in the grass and then look at the stars. Oh no, there’s only enough hot water for one shower… I guess you have to go in together. 

Good Old Fashioned Games

One of my favorite activities is playing yard games, be it a drinking game or a sober game, there’s always a way to get weird for Pride. I know not everybody will be into this, but for those guests who don’t consider “get up for another glass” to be enough mental stimulation, try one of my favorites:

  • Beer pong
  • Dice corners
  • Twister
  • Corn hole (make it interesting, use a dildo instead of a beanbag and get it into the hole)
  • The weird ladder ball game that my dad always makes me play

Fly Your Freak Flag High

Hang up the flags you used to have in your childhood bedroom. If you’re anything like my family, you never threw anything away and they are still in your closet. Though they might have been cringe as decoration, now is the time to let your conservative neighbors know that you are actually Gay AF.

Dress To Impress 

Wear rainbow suspenders. Wear a crop top. Do your makeup, even if the only people you will see have been with you this whole time. Apply copious amounts of glitter. Wear suspenders. Dress in the gender you really identify as, if that’s safe where you are. None of these are restricted to a parade! You can be big, loud, gay, and fun in your own home. Take some polaroids, start a Pride scrap book! If you really desire a celebration, there are still options. Don’t forget to post to Instagram, you can even tag @GOMagazineny to show us your fun Pride looks

Camp Moment

Rosé all day, the weather has been getting hotter which means being outside in the sun and sipping on a nice cocktail, beer, or chilled wine. While you’re outside it might be a good idea to set up a shady spot with a tent or a sheet, whatever you have available. You can make a pillow fort and really get creative with lights. Drinking in a tent is one of life’s truest pleasures. Just have enough sleeping bags for everyone to stay over so nobody is driving drunk. 

Be Proud

Of course the most important thing to have during Pride, is pride. Even if you can’t do anything on this list because your family isn’t accepting, they can’t take away the pride that burns inside of you. One day, you will be away from them, and we will be here, face to face, ready to welcome you. 

GO wishes everyone a happy healthy Pride this year. Stay strong, stay safe, stay proud. We love you!

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