Queer Girl Fashion Icon of the Week: “Lesbian Sweetheart” Stephanie Frosch Talks “Edgy-Femme Chic” To Us

“I always find it sexy to be wearing an outfit that teases the eye.”

“Lesbians have terrible style!” I overhead a nauseatingly-basic-clad “straight girl” moan at a cocktail party last week. My blood boiled in rage. Lesbians have terrible style? What rock has this wonder-brat been living under? I thought to myself, gulping back my wine, shooting daggers across the room with my furious eyeballs.

I don’t know how or when this rumor, that lesbians “don’t have style” kicked off, but it’s complete bullshit and royally pisses me off. Yes, we’ve been known to rock flannel, but who says flannel isn’t chic, anyway? Fashion hipsters all over Brooklyn and Manhattan have been religiously tying flannels around their waists for the past two decades. And who started that trend, my little queer kittens? We did.

Just like we started the “fanny pack trend” that GO Mag writer and editor Corinne, so lovingly wrote about in this article. Just like we started the “half-shaved-head-haircut trend” that still penetrates the international rocker-girl scene. Just like we started the “badass boots and denim” trend that magazines like Cosmo are always attempting to teach girls how to “pull off.” Lesbians don’t need a how-to guide in pulling any of these looks off. We were born looking sexy in distressed denim and Dr. Marten boots. We were born with high-fashion swag, baby.

It’s no secret to queer women that lesbians are the true tastemakers in the world of style; but it’s time we got some freaking credit you know?

Which is why I decided to highlight a different iconic queer woman each week and talk to her about her fierce style in my new GO mag column “Queer Girl Fashion Icon of The Week” (Message me if you’re interested in submitting!).

I first became aware of the stellar gay-writer, video-producer, YouTuber, social media star and tireless activist, Stephanie Frosch a few years ago. I came across one of her YouTube videos whilst trolling the internet and was immediately intrigued. Frosch was so authentic, so engaging, she attained that rare, special, innate charisma. The magnetic energy of ~Hollywood actress~. Only she didn’t need a script. She could articulate complex ideas into simple digestible ones, beautifully.

Only unlike the movie stars, Frosch doesn’t need a script. She writes her own script. She has the amazing ability to articulate complex ideas into simple digestible ideas—a sign of real intelligence.

I  wasn’t surprised to learn that Frosch had a whopping 359,145 subscribers on her YouTube channel. It also made perfect sense to me why so many of those followers were young, high-risk teenagers so clearly positively impacted by Frosch. Frosch attains all the qualities of a true role model; she’s accessible and has a trust-worthy, gorgeously-vulnerable way about her. Watching her videos makes you feel like you’re hanging out with your best friend. Or the cool older lesbian sister you dreamed of as a closeted teen.

All of this nice, but why is Frosch a Queer Girl Fashion Icon, you ask? Because she’s got killer style, baby! I’ve been stalking her style as long as I’ve been stalking her YouTube videos. All those fabulously-distressed-black-jeans! All those badass leather jackets! The thick mane of hair and the perfectly lined eyes! Frosche’s style has an enviable grunge-chic-90s-cool-girl vibe.

But hey, I need to shut (as usual). Let’s let the fierce Frosche describe her style/beauty routine in her own words.

GO Magazine: Who are you and what do you do?

Stephanie Frosch: Im Stephanie Frosch, but I am also known as ElloSteph in the world of social media. I am a gay writer, video producer, actor, and activist, but you can just call me the “Internet’s Lesbian Sweetheart” for short.

GO: Who are your greatest fashion icons?

SF: I’d have to say my biggest icon is fashion and lifestyle blogger, Luanna Perez-Garreaud. What I most love about her style is that she incorporates soft, sweet looks with more avant-garde pieces, such as a patched up leather jacket. She really nails the “edgy femme” look that I typically go for. A few of my other icons include Jane Birkin and Selena Gomez.

GO: Find ten adjectives that fully describe your personal style?

SF: Eclectic, bold, sweet, edgy, vintage, versatile, poetic, classic, sleek, authentic.

GO: How do you feel about makeup? Love it, hate it? What products do you use? Do you have a signature makeup look?

SF: Makeup is one of my favorite forms of expression that I can wear. What I love the most about makeup is the process. To me, putting on my makeup is my “unwinding” time. It’s when I can just zone out and use my face as a canvas. I use many different products since I believe every product works differently for each individual. Some of my favorites include Benefit’s Professional primer, Stila waterproof eyeliner, Maybelline Age Rewind Eraser, and Urban Decay’s All Nighter Setting Spray. My look varies depending on my day. If I’m just going out and about running errands, I’ll wear a light foundation, some highlight, and a touch of mascara. If I need a look to last the entire day I’ll use a liquid foundation, I’ll highlight and contour my face, have some eyeshadow, and eyeliner only on the top lid with some mascara. The one makeup detail that I will never leave my house without doing is my eyebrows. If eyes are the windows to the soul, then eyebrows must be the curtains, right?

GO:  Where do you shop?

SF: I shop at many different places. I only get my jeans at American Eagle, because they are the only place I have found that make a 00 with a short inseam (short problems). I’ll occasionally go to Urban Outfitters and H&M, but I tend to find my favorite, signature, pieces at thrift stores or at the Melrose Trading Post here in LA.

Friday? More like FriYAY! Am I right? (Please validate me and my lame puns)

A post shared by Stephanie Frosch (@ellosteph) on

GO: What was your most embarrassing fashion phase? Or have you been perfect and cool forever?

SF: I was the girl who had a wheely backpack way longer than anyone should, so you can imagine my fashion choices were certainly… unique. When I was in middle school I was so insecure about my body, and who I was as a person. Because of this, instead of choosing clothing that made me happy, I would choose clothing that made me feel invisible and less noticeable. I would wear big Pokemon t shirts and loose shorts that would be long enough to cover my pale legs. It got to the point where my fashion style was so terrible that my little sister would ask to help me shop. I’m very proud of how far I have come since then.

GO: Describe an outfit you would wear to slay a job interview.

SF: I’d wear a modest skirt, a fitted lace (or some other textured) white blouse, black Chelsea boots, and I would top it all off with my navy Kooples blazer that has black leather lapels to give that sophisticated, but still edgy vibe.

Queen of awkward poses

A post shared by Stephanie Frosch (@ellosteph) on

GO: Describe an outfit you wear on a date with a woman you were wildly attracted to.

SF: I’d wear something simple, but still flirty. If I’m on a date with someone who I am wildly attracted too, of course, I would want the feelings to be reciprocated, but in a way that is authentically me. I would probably wear my hair up, so my bone structure doesn’t get hidden. I’d wear either a shirt or accent pieces that bring out my blue eyes. Perhaps some black skinny jeans, a romantic top, and a pair of heels for an added boost of confidence (and height).

GO: Describe an outfit you would wear if you wanted to feel insanely sexy?

SF: I always find it sexy to be wearing an outfit that teases the eye. An open back shirt or dress, a flowy skirt with a drastically high slit that you can only spot at the right angle, an almost completely sheer top with a sexy bra underneath. I love it when my clothing not only peeks a woman’s curiosity but also keeps them interested in knowing what is underneath. I prefer that style to very tight or minimal clothing because I like to keep the visual foreplay going for as long as possible.

GO: Is there such thing as lesbian style?

SF: To me, if you are a lesbian, and you have your own unique style, then you have lesbian style. My opinion is that a lesbian style isn’t about the stereotypical flannels and leather jackets. Instead, it is a woman who is comfortable and confident in herself and her sexuality; she bases her style choices off of the one woman who matters the most, herself.

What Do You Think?

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