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The ‘Gym Rat Butch’ And 9 Other Butches We Love

February 21, 2019

10 butches that'll totally kill that spider for you.

Take it from someone who loves masculine women very, very much: There is no one way to be butch. Butch women come in many different forms, and they express themselves so many different ways. Some butch lesbians wouldn’t be caught dead in sneakers, while others wear sneakers at all times, regardless of the occasion. Some rock bowties. Others rock gold chains. We live in a lovely universe full of butch diversity, and as a butch-appreciating femme, may I just say, “thank gawd.”

With the advent of more flexible gender categories, like “nonbinary” or “genderqueer,” the butch identity might seem a lot less common than it used to be. Nonetheless, there are countless women out there who still identify as butch, masculine, stud, AG, or any of the other wonderful identities that make up the masculine-of-center end of the spectrum. If anything, there are more ways to be a masculine-presenting lesbian now than ever before. How exciting!

Here are 10 types of butch lesbians that’ll probably kill that spider for you, then steal your heart.

1. The Gym Rat Butch

Swipe through any dating app for 90 seconds, and you’ll definitely come across a gym rat butch in the wild. This lesbian feels her best when she goes to the gym every morning and pumps iron… or whatever people do at the gym. She adds protein to her smoothies. She has five different apps on her phone for her workout regimen.

The gym rat butch is super swole and looks great in a muscle tee and shorts, which is lucky because she always seems to be either at the gym, on her way to the gym, or leaving the gym at any given moment. She’s really into neon.

2. The Lipstick Butch

You’ve heard of a lipstick lesbian, yes? But you may not have noticed that there are also lipstick butches. These butches are unmistakably masculine in their clothing, haircut, and mannerisms, but they also have unbelievably smooth skin and feminine facial features. They highlight those features with a quick sweep of mascara and a bold lip, and femmes everywhere melt on sight.

These lesbians scoff at the gender binary. They are also extremely kissable.

3. The Punk Butch

The punk butch is rarely spotted with an outfit that’s not ripped or torn in some way. You’ll know her by her Dr. Martens, leather jacket, Chuck Taylors, stick-and-poke tattoo, and a lack of deodorant. She never, ever goes to a professional for a haircut, and she has, at some point, rocked baby bangs.

The punk lez is a multidisciplinary artist and so are all of her friends. She may not have her own apartment, but she can take you to cool music shows and show you all the best spots for dumpster diving.

4. The Sneakerhead Butch

If the sneakerhead lesbian doesn’t already have an entire closet just for her shoes, then she could certainly use one. She has a sneaker with every single color combination that you can imagine, and she’s not done collecting yet!

The sneakerhead is always on the lookout for her next pair. She can name the specific year and colorway of a pair of sneakers with a single glance. She somehow manages to wear sneakers to funerals or weddings and still look fancy as hell.

Usually, this lesbian is either really great or really terrible with her finances. Those shoes don’t come cheap!

5. The Farmer Butch

The farmer butch is really good with her hands (wink, wink). She may or may not work on an actual farm, but if not, she grows an impressive amount of plants in her own home garden. She wears the same pair of boots all the time and always has dirt under her nails, and when she comes over with a full basket of freshly picked kale, you basically want to kneel at her feet in gratitude. This lesbian is a provider, mmkay?

She drives a pickup truck and wears a cowboi hat. Not only will she kill your spiders, but she will also fix stuff at your house.

6. The Dapper Butch

The dapper butch must be a superhero because she has somehow figured out how to have a never-ending arsenal of perfectly tailored suits and shoes for women. Where does she find them? How do they fit her so well? Nobody really knows.

She likes to make things pop with a colorful tie or a bright blue Oxford shoe. She has this swagger about her that makes cis men wild with envy because she does masculine dress-wear sooo much better than they do. Since she’s a natural in a suit, she also has a cool “grownup” job. Sa-weet.

7. The Buddha Butch

The Buddha lesbian radiates calm. She meditates every morning, lights incense, and posts feel-good memes about inner peace. She prefers to dress in comfy, flowing clothes—lots of drop-crotch pants and scarves—and she keeps her hair short and simple.

The Buddha lesbian might be a literal Buddhist or she might just be generally spiritual, but either way, she is so ~mindful~ that just entering her house makes you feel 100 times more chill. She’ll cook you a great vegetarian meal and give you really great advice, if you ask.

8. The Party Bro Butch

The party bro butch is a “promoter” or a “nightlife organizer” or some other vague title that means she throws the hottest queer parties since queer was a slur. She does not really care what she wears since people will always lust after her because of her connections and reputation.

Accordingly, the party bro lesbian tends to walk around with this unflappable sense of confidence even whilst wearing a gray sweatsuit and bedhead (because she’s hot AF). She is not a snob, though. She just wants everyone to have a good time. She’ll buy you a shot.

9. The Professor Butch

The professor butch is mature, smart, and just a lil’ (okay, extremely) nerdy. She wears glasses and sweater vests and button-up shirts, and she always wears a belt rather than let her pants sag.

If the professor lesbian doesn’t already have her master’s degree in something, it’s only because she’s a) currently in school or b) fundamentally disagrees with the tenets of academia. She has an enormous bookshelf filled with books from her field of study, and she will happily read to you before bed. Swoooon.

10. The Tech Butch 

The tech lesbian is an underrated genius who’s also tough as nails, a little awkward, and an expert at dealing with sexist dudes. Fashion is not really her thing, though she has recently upgraded from boring rectangular glasses to a funky, fashionable pair. Honestly, you don’t know what she’s doing or talking about half the time, but you love her ~passion~ and how she never gets tired of you asking questions about your MacBook.

Who is your favorite butch? Let us know in the comments!

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