Sandy & Ida — Manila, Philippines
Sandy Aloba, Actor and host
Ida Ramos, Dance teacher
When Sandy went back to university in 1995, she was just expecting to complete her undergrad thesis. However, she walked away with more than that; she met Ida, her partner. At the time, Ida was 19 and Sandy was about to turn 25, which turned a few heads. “Believe me, that scandalous age gap was a major issue,” jokes Sandy.
But regardless of the six-year age gap, the couple quickly became inseparable. It was as if they were meant for each other — everything just seemed to click. “Everything was instant from the moment we met,” says Sandy. “We were instant best friends, inseparable from day one. We shared everything at once: friends, a wallet, even decisions.”
Before the pandemic, the couple was working with a community of people to fight for marriage equality in the Philippines and the amending of laws. Sandy recognizes that they have a long way to go, considering divorce isn’t even legal in the country, but they are still determined to do their part in the fight. That work was halted over the last year, though, and Sandy and Ida have had to shift focus inward. With all their extra free time, the pair says they’ve been spending it together — and with their 10-year-old son Liam, who is “the best thing to ever happen to our lives,” says Sandy.
And though Sandy and Ida have been together for nearly 25 years, neither has tired of the other’s company. As homebodies, they prefer to celebrate any occasion at home with a home-cooked meal and a few drinks rather than getting all dressed up to go out. As long as they’re together, they’re happy. Thanks to that mentality, the pandemic has felt like just another opportunity to spend time with each other. “We surprisingly still haven’t run out of stories to tell each other,” says Sandy, “and the lockdown let us do that uninterrupted.”
Leila & Fleur — London, England
Leila Davis, Model, pole dance performer/instructor/consultant, model, waiter
Fleur Finch, Support worker for the homeless
Leila first remembers meeting Fleur at a party during her time at university. “I thought she was captivating, and I knew I had to speak to her, so I waited a little bit and then went up to her and started trying to flirt with her and get to know her because I thought she was really cool and sexy,” says Leila. Fleur was politely not interested, though, as she was talking someone else at the time, so Leila left her alone.
Sometime later, Fleur spotted Leila in a club and was instantly charmed; however, she was disappointed to be the one turned down this time around. “I thought she looked charming, so [I] plucked up the courage to talk to her and got absolutely shot down,” says Fleur. “It was spectacular.” This happened a few more times over the next few months. They would see each other at parties and clubs, flirt, and feel a spark, but ultimately nothing came of it — that is, until November, when they found each other on the way to the same jazz club. The two walked to the club together and unintentionally ignored their friends for the rest of the night. After it was over, they spent the early morning hours walking through the streets of Brighton, laughing, kissing, and getting to know each other in an electric way. “We both agree that that first kiss was the best kiss of our lives,” says Fleur. “We’ve never been apart since.”
That long, early-morning walk was the start of their relationship, and for Leila, it was also when she knew Fleur was the one. And while it was more of a feeling than an isolated moment, it was a clear sign. “I remember her telling me her worries in life as we talked into the early hours of the morning,” says Leila, “and I remember just knowing that she didn’t have to worry because I knew that we were going to be together and that we were going to make each other so happy.”
For Fleur, the moment came during an anxiety attack. During a shopping trip, Fleur laughed as Leila did a jig around the store and realized she loved her. Anxious from the major realization, she started panicking. Leila, however, didn’t shy away; she was “so kind and tender to me, it was like she instinctively knew what to do,” says Fleur. As Leila held her and shielded her from onlookers in the store, Fleur says everything stopped feeling scary, and her anxiety has almost evaporated since they’ve been together. “It’s like my body knew it was right, and I feel at peace for the first time in my life,” says Fleur.
While lockdown was hard for the couple in the beginning, Leila and Fleur have strengthened their relationship with better communication and reveled in the extra time to spend together. They’re currently working on planning their wedding for a tentative Spring 2022 date, “which is a huge project, especially during a pandemic,” says Leila. The pair also runs an Instagram account for their apartment, which started as a way to fight quarantine boredom and recently won them the Apartment Therapy’s viewers choice Dream Home. Individually, Fleur is working on restoring vintage furniture for their home and to sell, while Leila runs Blackstage Pole, a platform that showcases Black and POC pole dancers in the UK.
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