We all know those lesbian couples who spend so much damn time together that they start looking alike. Talking alike. Dressing alike (fashion sin!). They show up to parties in matching skinny jeans and black tee-shirts. Gag. PSA: There is nothing chic about losing your identity.
However, Stella Maxwell and K Stew engaged in a controversial game of “couple coordinating” at Chanel’s “We Love Coco” beauty house bash last night on Sunset Blvd. (I was supposed to be there but my private jet to LA ran out of fuel in Milan, dahling).
Our favorite celesbian couple both rocked appropriately Parisian black and white outfits (très Coco!) to the event. Stewart donned the iconic Chanel black and white tweed matching skirt set, with Lolita-chic cream-colored ankle socks and chunky heels, while ~Maxwell~ channeled a 70s fashion-rocker (a more handsome Mick Jagger, perhaps?) with her awesome modern Chanel look: black leather cigarette pants, a white crop-top, and a loose fitted, slouchy leather blazer. She polished off the look with ironic, unexpected, high femme black pumps.
Now. Your snobby lesbian big sister (me) is going to explain WHY this is a positive example of couple outfit coordinating and not a creepy example (and for those of you crying “There is NO right way to dress!” get over it. There is! Fashion is cruel and so am I).
First of all, they aren’t dressed exactly alike. They share a color scheme and they’re draped in the same designer and both have bare midriffs. BUT, Stewart is in a classic French school girl skirt, and has a much ~softer~ feel to her outfit (Important: fashion is all about ~feelings~, not about intellect. Which is why cold intellects tend to dress terribly and emotional train wrecks like me know how to dress honey!).
I look at Stewart and I see a chic AF teenage rebel, ready to escape her tiny village and head to PARIS. She’s still got her school uniform on, but she’s made it wild and naughty by pulling the frumpy sweater off one shoulder and juxtaposing the look with a severe red lipstick (Chanel reds are the best! Zara’s pick: “Pirate.” It’s even better than “Ruby Woo” by MAC).
On the contrary, Maxwell looks like the bad boi from the wrong side of the tracks that is going to seduce sweet Stewart with her leather swag!
Only she juxtaposes her look with soft, innocent makeup.
Their colors coordinate perfectly, but the feeling of their looks contrast from one another dramatically. Their designers are the same, but their makeup is wildly different. Their crop-tops are the same, but they are styled differently! AM I MAKING SENSE?
So what did we learn from this, baby dykes? That you have to be an actress and a supermodel to chicly couple coordinate? No, sweet honey. You can totally rock looks like these from H&M, ZARA (the store, not me), or Aritzia. The moral of the story is, that your looks, my darling codependent lezzies, can complement each other, but they have to invoke a different emotion. They can tell the same story, but you have to play different characters in the story, you know?
If you’re both going to wear ripped jeans, one of you should style your hair so it looks rumpled and heroin chic and the other should wear their hair perfectly coiffed. If you’re both going to wear the color mint, one of you should wear a vintage mint sweater and the other should wear a modern mint jumpsuit. Just saying.
When you coordinate like this, you look can cohesive together without losing your precious individuality. And the key to keeping the sex alive in a longterm relationship, is maintaining your precious individuality.