There are only so many Netflix-and-chill or dinner-and-a-movie date nights you can have with your bae before they get super boring. If you’re an introvert who also happens to be dating another introvert, sometimes even getting out of the house can be a struggle. Especially the further along and more comfortable you get in your relationship. Oftentimes, heading to your local bar with a huge group of friends doesn’t seem appealing. Neither do double dates.
While I’m definitely more introvert-leaning, I’d like to think of myself as an awesome date planner. I mean, one time I planned a homemade picnic in Central Park second date complete with rosé. I have a little game when it comes to planning romantic and adventurous dates. So let me help you help your relationship, lezzie introverts. We all deserve to go on awesome dates that aren’t at a loud and crowded bar!
You can either share this list with bae to figure out the best option for your next date night, or you could try surprising her with a date from this list!
1. Museum & Desserts
Whether you live in a big metro city or a more rural quiet town — there is definitely at least one art museum or gallery close to you. Look up their exhibits and mark on your calendar when is a good time to go. Meander around with bae in the quiet museum vibe — which is perfect for introverts because silence is encouraged in museums. Afterwards, you can head to a cafe and order decadent desserts while you talk about all the beautiful art you just saw.
2. Go On A Snowbunny Adventure
There are so many options here, babe. However, this is obviously tailored more for those of us who live in places with all four seasons. Sorry, L.A. lezzies! First step is bundling up in your cutest snowbunny outfits. Then you get to pick — do you want to go ice-skating, sledding, skiing, make snow angels? My personal favorite is ice-skating or sledding. Major bonus points if you pack a thermos full of a hot toddy mix (or hot cocoa if you opt for no alcohol).
3. Do A Cook-Off Competition
Don’t do this if one of you is an Aries. It just would end badly. However, this can be a fun way to stay at home in your comfort zone and do something other than order take out and watch “Carol” for the twentieth time. You should pick a theme for your cooking — whether it’s a common ingredient like rice or something specific like a homemade Italian dish. You have to learn how to both maneuver around each other in the kitchen (which can be a telltale sign if you vibe well and know how to communicate with your partner) and at the end of the competition, you get to enjoy a delicious meal together! Also, if one of your dishes ends up an epic burnt failure, you still have something to eat.
4. Make A Fort
When the urge to stay in is too strong to resist, lean into it. I’m not here to push all you introverts so far out of your comfort zone that you end up hating each other. But if you’re going to stay home, try to do something different than your usual routine. Do you work from home and your lady has to stay late at work one night? Make a cute fort for her to come home to. You know, the kind of forts you made as a kid, rounding up every blanket in the house and taking over the whole living room. Add some Christmas lights to create a romantic ambiance and pour her a well deserved glass of red wine. Now that’s my kind of date night (~hint hint~).
5. Take A Class Together
A cooking glass, a ceramics class, a Tango class. Wherever your mutual interests intersect, find a class near you. Learning something together can be such an incredible bonding moment –you get to explore this new thing with your girl! Maybe you realize that she’s the lead dancer when you always thought you would be. Or it’s entirely possibly that one of you takes to the ceramics class instantly and then you get to have a romantic “Ghost” moment where you sit behind her and teach her your newfound skills.
6. Create Found Object Artwork
I know this might sound a little silly. But work with me, babe. Found object artwork can be super intriguing because you never know what you’re going to come up with. Maybe you find a long lost letter to a lover or some beautiful stones you picked up at the beach this summer. Take whatever you feel drawn to and create something out of it. Having this creative night with your babe can get you feeling connected over what you make together. You might come up with some beautiful new jewelry for each other. Or something to hang on the wall of your first apartment!
7. Holigay Light Judging
Listen, we all have an inner judgy side. Just admit it. It can be fun to let that side of yourself really flourish — within the right context. Going around and judging all your neighbors Holigay lights is the best chance for this! If you really want to go all-out for this date, I’d suggest making categories to vote in and little cards you fill out for each house. Then you can compare and see what you both thought about each house!
8. Go On A Tasting Tour
You could get boozy and do a wine or whiskey tasting tour. Or you could get fancy and do a chocolate or cheese tasting tour. Whatever your vibe is, there is a tasting tour for you. Sometimes this is a better option than going to the bar for introverts because you have the option to get a little tipsy, while still being in a slower and quieter space. Groupon is a great place to search for all the best tasting tours near you.
9. Find An Awesome Cultural Event
The possibilities are endless here and this is the most ideal date for introverts because you get to have a shared experience that gives you something to talk about afterwards. I highly recommend this for ~new couples~ that are still getting to know one another. You can go to a talk, panel discussion, Holigay DIY craft fair, a musical, or see live music. These events don’t require much conversation during the actual date but open up all the possibilities for conversation afterwards. Did she love the speakers’ opinions? Was the DIY craft a total and utter failure? Dive into it and get to know your date better.
10. Go To An Animal Shelter
I know you think I’m kidding but I’m not. Going to an animal shelter is literally the cutest date. You get to play with puppies and kittens and squeal in pure joy. There is nothing more amazing than baby animals. They remind us of everything that is good in this world. Just be careful that you don’t end up taking one of the cuties home with you!
Corinne Kai is the Managing Editor and resident sex educator at GO Magazine. You can listen to her podcast Femme, Collectively or sign up for her witchy wellness newsletter or just stalk her on Instagram.