Conservatives Are Triggered By Target’s Gay Nutcracker

He's giving season.

Did they honestly think nutcrackers were straight?

If you thought Build-A-Bear’s RuPaul bear was bad, just wait until you hear about Target’s Pride Christmas Nutcracker. I’ll give you a minute to untwist your panties and pick your jaw up off of the floor.

Yes, Target had the audacity to feature a range of inclusive Christmas decor, including a nutcracker holding a Pride flag and a Black Santa Claus using a wheelchair.

Fox News brought our attention this extremely hard-hitting story, with Jesse Watters reporting “We sent one of our producers to Target, and they found this gay Nutcracker complete with a rainbow hat and trans flag. Full price, $12, but right now it’s on sale for eight.” (Giving credit where credit is due, mentioning that the nutcracker is on sale is absolutely savage shade.)

Guest Riley Gaines agreed with Watters, adding, “It doesn’t make sense. You have to ask yourself, why do they keep pushing this? Who are they trying to appeal to?”

“Despite what the media portrays or how politicians are voting, this doesn’t represent the overwhelming majority of how this country, really how the world, feels on this issue*,” she said.

*gay nutcrackers? Santa using a wheelchair while Black? unclear as to what the “issue” is.

“I think the majority of people… they can acknowledge that Gay Nutcracker and Black Disabled Santa has gone way too far,” Gaines concluded. If you’re wondering how she said this with a straight face, so am I.

Just wait until they find out that the reason we decorate with nutcrackers for Christmas is because of the famous ballet, The Nutcracker, written by (the very gay) Pyotr Tchaikovsky. Happy Holigays!

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